Kailey Mingo

When he doesn’t say, “I’m sorry”

February 07, 2018 | Kristen James

Marriage & Relationships

Mike and I are getting married in November and with that comes a lot of “teaching moments.” The stress of planning a wedding, figuring out the finances and asking all the hard “before you get married” questions is tense enough but add in being 600 miles apart (he’s in the Army)… and bam, we’ve got some conflict!

I’m very blessed and generally when we get into a spat we’re both quick to apologize and ask forgiveness but recently a squabble over save the dates (yes, you read that right) got me thinking. What happens when he doesn’t say “I’m sorry?”

In my frustration, I thought, “I don’t want to forgive him, he didn’t even apologize.” Oh my, God had to set me straight. Years ago, while studying forgiveness, I had come up with a nugget of wisdom…

“Do I want God to forgive like me? Or do I want to forgive like God?”

Let that sink in for a minute.

If God, who knows all of my sin and ick, says “I forgive you,” “your sin is as far from you as the east is from the west” and welcomes me back in with open arms… who am I to deny forgiveness? I don’t want God to forgive my way with a cold shoulder and short answers or to bring up every little thing I’ve done wrong with receipts.

Besides that, I’m only responsible for myself and no one else. I know I need to do right by God and He says to forgive. So whether or not Mike or anyone says, “I’m sorry,” I am accountable for doing what I know is right in my heart.

And for the record, he did apologize, because he’s awesome like that. wink

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